Don't Try -- Do!

If you want something, you have to make it happen. It bothers me when I ask someone to do something and they answer, "I'll try." I never know whether it's going to happen or not.

Saying you'll try to do something, rather than saying you will do it, indicates that you're not confident you can make it happen. You're starting out with a disadvantage.

There is no such thing as trying to live like a better person. You either do it or you don't. If you're trying, you've put something or someone else in charge of whether or not to succeed.

When you're trying, you can't be doing. To say you'll try to do something is to say that you'll engage it in a struggle, that you're willing to wrestle with it. It has nothing to do with whether it will happen or not. All trying does is give you an excuse in case you want to abandon the project for some reason.

In some circles "try" is a dirty word. When people hear it, they roll their eyes and assume the thing isn't going to happen. They don't trust people who use the word "try" to get anything done, because such people obviously don't trust themselves or really don't want to do it in the first place. People who try keep themselves stuck in the process of moving toward something, and if they're stuck there, they can never reach their goal. The process of trying and the process of completing are two different things.

The first question people ask when I say this is, "But how do I stop trying?" They are starting to hear all the negative person's old tapes:
"You can't do that."
"Hah! I've heard that before."
"You know you can't be trusted."

It's like a computer program that comes rolling out of your mind. The only way you can stop it is to reprogram the computer. Put in disks that say, "I'm going to do it. I'm going to make it happen."

Say to yourself, "From this moment on I'm a better person. I think like a better person, feel like a better person, and behave like a better person." Note the "better person" because this can apply to anything you want to accomplish.

Just let that change happen inside you, without going back and thinking or worrying about it. Allow yourself to be better right now. If you look at it for a moment, you'll see that there's really very little you can do. Being better is more a statement of what you're being than a question of what you're doing.

You're the one who has to make it happen. You're the only one who can. When you say, "I'll do it," rather than, "I'll try to do it," you burn your bridges behind you. There's nowhere to go except in the direction you've chosen. Just doing it can make you your strongest ally.